Its been a while....

I tried to start a new blog yesterday but it didnt work out. i couldnt quite find a good reason to leave here. even though i havent written in a while and it feels like i'm talkin to myself most of the time,i still feel at home here.

i dont know how come i just noticed this about myself but i find it extremely hard to flow with people i just met. like i cant ever have a good first convo. i always say something daft. i know i'm shy and blah blah. but recently i've been unattractively timid! thats how a guy i just met was telling me bout himself then he went "I'm a power person. I just like to be the one n-charge ,you know" and out of all the dumbest reponses i could possibly give i chose to say "oh? so that means you think you're always right?" then he gives me this really blank stare. yes,i know that was highly off point! i should stop trying too hard abi? i should have just done what i would normally have done- nodded! like really,is it so wrong to be quiet and shy or whatever. i bet all boys dont like talkative,loud girls do they?

funny thing is that, when i'm with certain people(some which i also just met), this shyness thing doesnt come up. like i'm totally free. but some people even when i've known them for twenty years i just cant picture us rolling on the floor laughing and slapping each other on the back and stuff like that.

oh whatever.